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Monday, December 6, 2010

The Assassination of the Inner Critic

I have loyal supporters* who would love for me to release more material, more often. For a long time, I didn’t have the heart to tell them that I probably could if I could just mute the inner critic that constantly torments me. It is the villain that keeps me working on a single page for an entire week in a frustrating attempt to get everything just right. It is the plague that poisons my mind and makes me spend all morning taking out a comma, until I finally decide that it belongs where I put it. My inner critic is bigger than King Kong. It keeps me up at night and causes me to doubt myself.


I’d like to take this moment to thank KR Bankston, Elizabeth LaSahun, and DK Gaston for giving me the tools necessary to assassinate my inner critic with what is called a DEADLINE (Even though I missed the 1st one by about a month) We’re putting together an anthology which I’d like to say from now, is going to be amazing! If it was up to me, I’d still be writing my contribution well into next year. I’m grateful for the opportunity to work with such talented authors and the pressure of finishing somewhat on time has helped me immensely. Now I just close my eyes and write. Yeah, at times when I re-read I question my own thought process because occasionally, there will be gibberish but, for the most part, I get much more done now. This project has helped me free myself and take a step closer to being a complete author. I can’t forget to thank Kisha Green as well. She gave me the opportunity to write a weekly column called, “Makes Me Wanna Holla” on her www.writers-vibe.com site. Also, Brandie Randolph has also given me the opportunity to write articles freelance for her as well.

As far as finally putting an end to my inner critic, I haven’t. I still need it for the editing process but I’ve learned to lock it up until then. Lately, I’ve found that my stories flow more fluidly. It feels good to be able to smoothly empty all of the voices in my head onto the paper. They used to haunt me and scream to be set free. Now, I only let the inner critic take over when I have the red pen and highlight marker in my hand.


*[I hate the word fan because it’s derived from the word fanatic and none of my supporters are fanatics]

2 comments:

  1. You're gonna have to start getting that inner critic drunk. That's all.

    ReplyDelete
  2. You're right....Starting off with a bottle of Patron......

    ReplyDelete