This is a dangerous love affair to say the very least. I can see the light of God inside you but you can also be a beast. The pain that you walk around with makes you beautifully ugly, if that makes sense. Let me show you what I see.
When provoked, your hate is unrivaled and wild, impossible to stop. To be honest, your level of “mean” is almost unlike anything I’ve ever seen. Everything in me says to stay clear of your path because it’s not worth making a misstep and risking falling in the line of your wrath. It just doesn’t make sense, it doesn’t add up and it equals bad math. I know that you can be a monster but because you’re being you, you’re beautiful.
No, I’m not blind. The beautiful I see has nothing to do with your shape, your eyes or the wicked smile that will sometimes grace your face. There’s an aura, a vibe, or what I’d call a unique energy that envelops your space. It’s there even though, behind that smile lies teeth that can tear and maim along with a tongue that can break hearts.
Despite all of that, I can feel something else fighting to be free because you’ve trapped it for fear that it would make you weak. Despite you holding it in, I’ve seen it in your tears. I’ve felt it on my fingers every time that I wiped them away. It’s only the “pretty” that you try so hard to hide, that makes me want to stay so close to you.
I’m just a man. Trust me, I’m well aware that you have enough game to cause confusion in these lames but me? I’m not exactly the same. The only thing I can promise is that I’ll always try to do the best that I can to understand. I’ll try to ease the pain that you live with and that dark cloud over everything…I’ll lift it. I’ll take my chances that you’ll injure me because of all the hurts you might inflict. The only thing I ask is that you don’t destroy me.
When provoked, your hate is unrivaled and wild, impossible to stop. To be honest, your level of “mean” is almost unlike anything I’ve ever seen. Everything in me says to stay clear of your path because it’s not worth making a misstep and risking falling in the line of your wrath. It just doesn’t make sense, it doesn’t add up and it equals bad math. I know that you can be a monster but because you’re being you, you’re beautiful.
No, I’m not blind. The beautiful I see has nothing to do with your shape, your eyes or the wicked smile that will sometimes grace your face. There’s an aura, a vibe, or what I’d call a unique energy that envelops your space. It’s there even though, behind that smile lies teeth that can tear and maim along with a tongue that can break hearts.
Despite all of that, I can feel something else fighting to be free because you’ve trapped it for fear that it would make you weak. Despite you holding it in, I’ve seen it in your tears. I’ve felt it on my fingers every time that I wiped them away. It’s only the “pretty” that you try so hard to hide, that makes me want to stay so close to you.
I’m just a man. Trust me, I’m well aware that you have enough game to cause confusion in these lames but me? I’m not exactly the same. The only thing I can promise is that I’ll always try to do the best that I can to understand. I’ll try to ease the pain that you live with and that dark cloud over everything…I’ll lift it. I’ll take my chances that you’ll injure me because of all the hurts you might inflict. The only thing I ask is that you don’t destroy me.
I loved the oxymoron beautifully ugly. Very unique. Your style is eloquent, yet to the point.
ReplyDeleteThank you Lena. I'm glad you appreciate my flow & style. I don't always write like this but lately, it's just felt right. I switch up depending on my mood. At it's raw core, it's always laced like this though. Sometimes I use more poetic prose, sometimes I use less. Thank you so much for your comments. (NOw I don't feel like I'm talking to myself)
ReplyDeleteThis describes me on some days. It's rare that another person takes time to see through that "monster" to the real person. When we find someone who can, we should treasure that person.
ReplyDeleteAnother great write, my friend!
I agree. There are at least three of "ME" in here at any given time. (I think the blog postings reflect that) A person has to love ALL of them to truly appreciate me.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the compliments Tee. :)